Bad hands

For the past week or so, my energy level has dropped to rock bottom.  It feels like my arms and legs are heavy, like I am under water. I just feel so sluggish.  It's hard to get out of bed. It's hard to get off the couch.  Thank goodness Celena can help with things like getting breakfast and lunch for Hayden.


I have been having "myclonic episodes" in my hands for the past year.  Some days are better than others, but lately, it has been so bad.  As I type, I am momentarily losing control of my hands.  It's something like a twitch, but its where my muscles "fail" for a moment.  I feel an electric jolt as it happens.  And it used to be mostly in my fingers and hands, but I have also experienced it in my arms and legs too.  It happens over and over and over.  If I was counting, It would probably be close to 100 times since I started typing this blog post. I can not even imagine how much more frustrating this would be if I was still working.  I would go out of my mind!!  Thank goodness I don't have to do much typing in my stay-at-home life (typing this blog is frustrating enough!)  It happens when I write as well.  And file my nails, work the TV remote, dial a phone, cut up strawberries, sew on Girl Scout patches, drive, comb Celena's hair, put on make-up, brush my teeth, drink my coffee, etc. etc. etc....!!!!  You get the picture.  My neurologist is sending me to the Emory Movement Disorder Clinic.  First available appointment is in September.  Ha!  I guess I have lived with it this long, might as well hang on until September!


I realize that I am focusing on the bad things that are happening to me.  But I also have good things happening too!  My wonderful neighbors, friends, and co-workers are providing meals for me and my family every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.  What a blessing!  I am monumentally behind on my Thank You notes.  I hope everyone knows how much their generosity has touched my heart and helped my family.


Also, there has been so many friends who are beyond generous and have gotten tested to possibly donate their kidney to me.  Wow, it sure means a lot that you like me that much!!  I feel honored.  I feel humbled.  I also feel not-worthy.  Have I been a good enough friend to each of these people?  I hope so.  Once I am well again, I'll be able to reach out more to my friends.


I have also had many many generous donations to my Kidney Transplant Fund.  This fund helps with medical bills now and in the future.  I am on I think 13 medicines.  That's a lot of money each month in co-pays.  Plus each time someone gets tested for me, it goes through my insurance and I get the bill.  Trust me, I am thankful to have those bills!  Very thankful!  Anyways, I have many blessings to count.